Self Day

29 Mar

People are amazing. Think about it: Souls with bodies with minds, and each one is special and unique.


But let’s get real for a moment.







You don’t always want them around.

Sometimes you just want to have no one else within shouting distance. This post is to prepare you for those days, in case you receive one but aren’t sure what to do with it. I have some suggestions.

What to do when you have the house/apartment/shed in a stranger’s backyard to yourself:

  • Sing. Forget talent. Sing as loudly as you can. I prefer showtunes, myself, but suit your own desires.
  • Talk to yourself. All that thinking that you do inside your head when other humans are around? Say it out loud. You’ll never know how awesome your mind is until you speak it out loud in an accent that doesn’t belong to you.
  • Dance. Goes well with the first option. Use a stuffed animal or a throw pillow as a partner if you feel so inclined.
  • Bake. When baking with people around, you have to deal with pesky inquiries about what you’re making, whether they can eat half, and why you won’t buy ingredients yourself – but baking alone? Guess who’s eating an entire batch of cookie dough.
  • Read out loud. More fun than it sounds, especially if you’re into doing different voices for each character (I’m a babysitter. Humor me.).
  • Homework.
  • Actually, yeah, you should probably do something productive too. It can be anything; you will feel immensely successful if you accomplish something while the others are away. But here’s the trick: you must make sure you are doing that thing when your roommate/family member gets home. Fill up the first few hours with the above activities, but within ten minutes of when your people said they’d be home, get busy. Then, no matter how much you’ve been blasting the Les Miserables soundtrack or reading Shakespeare in the strangest voices possible, it looks like you’ve been a good little boy scout all day.

Congratulations! Your day has been a success.

Now run along and play well with the others.


6 Responses to “Self Day”

  1. Laurie March 29, 2013 at 8:44 am #

    well, just heading out the door to work alone today. These will come in handy. Have a lovely day 😉

    • Emory March 29, 2013 at 3:17 pm #

      Hahaha, glad I could help! I hope you have a wonderful day as well! 🙂

  2. The Voyager April 8, 2013 at 5:57 pm #

    I say once again: we were separated at birth. These are all things I do regularly. Particularly speaking my thoughts/reading out loud in accents that don’t belong to me. And singing show tunes. And… gah just all of it. (The productiveness, however…. that’s a struggle.)

    • Emory April 8, 2013 at 9:21 pm #

      Amen, sister. And the productiveness is ALWAYS a struggle. But the show tunes help… Dishes get a little more glamorous when I’m pretending my life is a broadway musical. 🙂

  3. Mockingbird April 11, 2013 at 9:27 am #

    What about putting a pot on your head and grabbing a plunger and a whisk so you can run around screaming “EXTERMINATE!”
    You know…just an idea 🙂

    • Emory April 11, 2013 at 10:59 am #

      I completely approve of that option. Good thinking, Mockingbird! 🙂

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