Tag Archives: free will

Under the Influence

18 Mar

It’s really interesting, isn’t it, the way you become what you like?

I didn’t wear my peacoat nearly as much before I started watching Sherlock, and I certainly never left my collar up. Ever since White Collar, whenever I put on a hat, I try to spin it like Neal Caffrey and end up looking like I never quite mastered fine motor skills. My hair has been in milkmaid braids more times than I’d care to admit since I began to watch the Lizzie Bennet Diaries, and my nails are long and painted red right now. Not because they match my outfit, mind you. Because this.

amy

It’s worth mentioning at this point that if you understood every reference I just made, I owe you a firm handshake and a root beer float.

There are some entertainment-induced tendencies I don’t pick up that I wish I would (mad archery skills, River Song’s hair, etc. ) and tendencies I do pick up that I wish I wouldn’t (spontaneous British accent at inappropriate times, and I recently used “totes,” in a conversation).

Pre-Nerd me would probably think I was some sort of lunatic if she could see me now. Though, to be perfectly honest, it would not (did not)  take long to convert her to the nerd side.

But how far is this going to go? I don’t want to wake up in a year and find that nothing I do or say or believe is in any way my own. I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately.

The media tries really hard to remake people and tell them what to think. From beauty, to love, to infinity and beyond. I don’t even like people close to me to make big decisions for me. Why would I ever want the media to make them for me? I have to remind myself that although I may find that my emotions are often at the mercies of Joss Whedon, neither he nor his characters may touch me, my soul. That belongs to Someone Else, and I am its caretaker. I will not be, I am not one of the media’s puppets, and no matter how much it seems otherwise, I am not controlled by Steven Moffat. … I say this mainly because I assume that if I were, I’d most likely be dead by now (Pass up an opportunity to write something passive-aggressive about everyone’s favorite/most hated human being? Not this girl!).

Thanks for letting me rant. Every now and then, I get the urge to assert my free will. Thankfully, even after being the girl who had to replay the last few seconds of Lizzie Bennet Diaries #97 several times just to listen to three [beautiful] words over and over, I like to imagine that I have some aspects of my life at least kind of in control. That’s all anyone in this messed-up world can ask, right?

Perfectly sane, logical young woman – out.

And now that she’s gone, I really need to get something off my chest. Is it just me, or should no show ever be allowed to have as much backstory as Once Upon a Time has? Or as many new characters per episode? That show is turning me into a stark raving madwoman, please send help.

Okay, that’s really all now.

Have a spectacular day, friends!

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