Tag Archives: Reviews

I Can Review That: Friends Who Move

28 Aug

This week we’re reviewing something that has become very relevant lately, especially among the young-adult demographic! Hopefully by the end, I’ll be able to let you know if this is for you or not.

If you missed the introduction to this series and want a refresher on how my reviews work, follow the link to my first I Can Review That. In general, it’s pretty self-explanatory: I review the things that don’t get the type of “ratings”that most entertainment media does. I try to use a topical rating system since the range of subjects is so wide.

Today’s Topic: MISSING YOUR FRIEND SO MUCH YOU FINALLY LISTEN TO THE BOOK-ON-TAPE RECOMMENDATION THAT SHE MADE TO YOU IN 2015 AND THEN SENDING HER A MEME INSTEAD OF, LIKE, REACHING OUT TO HAVE A CONVERSATION

I can review that

  1. Presentation 1/5 – This does not appear at first glance to be a productive or fun way to spend time, so presentation is low on this one.
  2. Mouthfeel 4/5 – As generally melancholic as the spirit of this activity was, it was the romantic kind of melancholy, the book was wonderful, and the actor reading it was the perfect choice. Plus the meme was in great taste, of course.
  3. Plot 2/5 – This event did not advance the plot or lead to any positive changes (yet?), so from an efficiency point of view, I can’t say it was the ideal choice, but it was nice interlude to show the mc’s character and motivations.
  4. Softness 5/5 – This was the softest event of my summer thus far. Picture me, sitting on a blanket in my tiny living room, with my reading volume loud as hell as I mumble, “Geez, Miss Angorian, literally every time you show up it’s an imposition, just leave,” and paint a lighthouse on a cool rock I found that morning. Nothing softer.

Overall: 6/10 I enjoyed it and would do it again. If any of you are wondering if it’s worth the trouble to have a cherished one move to another state, I would say to you, do you have control over that? Wow man. You have a lot of power. Anyway,  don’t force your friends away from you – you really need to let them do them. People have to move around to find where they belong and who they belong with, especially in their twenties. It sucks sometimes. You’re going to have plenty of other relationships stretch to uncomfortable lengths whether you like it or not, and you should really appreciate the people in your life while you have them in your life. Then that way, when they’re a little harder to reach than before, at least you get to have moments like these where you just roll around in the good kind of nostalgia and end up with some very cool painted rocks. I think I’m going to mail one to her.

That’s what I would say to you, anyway.

Hope this helps

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I Can Review That

7 Aug

Today is the first of a new recurring series.

Let me introduce you two.

I like review blogs and I use them a lot, whether to decide whether or not I eat at a restaurant,  whether or not I use a service, or to scope out the plot of a horror movie that I’m too scared to actually watch with my own two eyes, but need to understand memes from.

However, there are a lot of things that I wish had reviews and ratings that don’t. I’m talking about that everyday stuff that doesn’t quite fit into an entertainment category. This series centers around that need of mine to furiously scope out a situation before I allow myself to enter it. I call it:

I can review that

 

This is, by nature, going to be a wide range of reviews, so I’ve included four criteria that I feel confident will be applicable to anything I post in this series.

  1. Presentation (A 5 on the presentation scale means that the subject was attractive and inviting. A 1 means it was very unpleasant)
  2. Mouthfeel (A 5 on the mouthfeel scale means the texture of the subject was good. A 1 means it was all wrong)
  3. Plot (A 5 means the subject was intriguing. A 1 means it was hard to follow or lost my interest)
  4. Softness (A 5 means that the subject felt good. A 1 means that it snagged easily and was uncomfortable)

In addition to the four ratings, each subject will receive an overall score to be rated on a scale of 1-10.

This new review system was born out of both my afore-mentioned affinity for review blogs and the fact that I am trying a lot of new things this year. Trying to branch out, you know? Anyway, to today’s topic.

PUTTING OUT THE RECYCLING EVERY WEEK ON WEDNESDAY AND OH MY GOSH, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY, TRYING TO KEEP TRACK OF WHETHER IT’S THE GLASS OR THE PAPER BINS THAT GET TAKEN THIS WEEK

I can review that

  1. Presentation 3/5
  2. Mouthfeel 2/5
  3. Plot 1/5
  4. Softness 1/5

Overall: 3/10 Can’t my neighbors do this every once in a while

Hope this review helps you guys decide whether or not it’s worth the trouble to not constantly have piles garbage in your home. See you next time

Trailer Breakdown for Maleficent

13 Nov

Hello, fanpeople, and welcome to yet another trailer breakdown.

The official teaser trailer for Maleficent came out this morning, and, wouldn’t you know it, it just felt right to aggressively push my disconnected ramblings about it onto the internet. Because reasons. I’m interested in everyone’s thoughts on this movie, so, if you feel so inclined, let me know about your disconnected ramblings too.

Shall we begin?

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Mmm, no, that is not the Disney castle, friend. Good try, though.
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Almost looks like Aurora Borealis. Sleeping Beauty must love it here.

:: Makes expectant face for duration of awkward silence ::

Do you get it?Because Sleeping Beauty’s name is Aurora and it’s not really a pun, but it is almost one you know what nevermind

It’s pretty. That’s all. I should probably go to the next scene.

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[fairy flutters by]

[because everyone knows that even if you’re not interested in a story about Maleficent, you’re totally interested in fairies]
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(Tour guide voice) … and to your left, you can feel the sweet, pretty whimsy of the landscape plummeting abruptly!

Aurora voiceover:

“I know who you are.mal_5

You’ve been watching over me my whole life.
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Oh, charming. Nothing should instill as much trust as does a grown adult lurking in the background of your past, am I right? mal_7

Need dramatic impact? Try a bird call. Nothing works quite so fast, besides the odd explosion or two. But for the record, I am pretty excited about that bird.
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You are not Merida, and those are not Will O’ the Wisps. Stop that nonsense.mal_9

Is that a mermaid fairy?

I know you’re there.

THAT’S A MERMAID FAIRY.mal_10

MOVIE INDUSTRY, WHY AM I JUST NOW DISCOVERING MERMAID FAIRIES?
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Your shadow has been following me ever since I was small.mal_12

The shadow with devil horns? That one? Yes, I agree. You should totally seek out the owner of that shadow and have tea with it. That just makes good, logical sense.mal_13

In fact, why don’t you just go touch that sharp object?mal_14

GET IT TOGETHER AURORAmal_15

Don’t be afraid!mal_16

Now, I’m not sixteen anymore, so maybe I’m no longer in the loop, but do sixteen-year-olds keep rocking horses around their bedrooms? Just for kicks and giggles? Nostalgia? So hard to keep up with the kids these days.mal_17

By the way, Aurora, if something even slightly resembling this is hiding from you, it’s probably not hiding because it is afraid.
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“I am not afraid.”
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“Then come out.”mal_20

“Then you’ll be afraid.”mal_21

Oh, look, thought Aurora, a red flag. That’s totally the first one so far. mal_22

Because up until this moment, she seemed a perfectly benevolent person.mal_23

  • Terrifying
  • Infinitely more terrifying if you’ve read Kingdom Keepers: Disney after Dark by Ridley Pearson
  • I really enjoyed that book by the way. Would recommend.

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Sorry, back to you, Maleficent. We all know how you get when you’re ignored.mal_25

(Tour guide voice) Straight ahead, Maleficent proceeds to illustrate my point with a rather overdramatic reaction to not being invited to a party, but hey – mal_26

 – go big or go home, right?
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There have been movies that I wanted to see from someone else’s point of view, and I must admit, Sleeping Beauty was not among them; at least, it wasn’t among my originals. But I have to say, this movie is looking pretty dang fabulous to me so far.
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And I get the feeling that Maleficent will murder me if I don’t, so hey, win-win.mal_29Oh, and 3D, thank heavens.

On Catching Up

23 Oct

Hello dearies,

This post comes to you in five parts: Once Upon a Time, Emma Approved, Agents of SHIELD, Cabin Pressure, and January. (Yes, the month)

As of late, I have been catching up with a couple things and before you is my collective review of them. I’m sorry not sorry.

Once Upon a Time and I have recently reconnected after our squabble last season. Maybe it’s the thrill of being together again, maybe it’s improved, or maybe I just needed some time to myself, but it’s like we were never apart. He still has those annoying little habits, like relating backstory for days, and presenting cringe-worthy CGI, but if I can’t handle him at his worst, than I don’t deserve him at his best.

Don’t worry, even I find that last paragraph embarrassing.

No, but seriously, I’m quite enjoying the show now, between our lovely new villain (Peter Pan) and a delightful twist on our lovely old one (Captain Hook).

However, I admit that seeing my baby Tinkerbell dressed like a 90’s pop star wigged me out a bit.

But what can you do?

Emma Approved started a couple of weeks ago, but it’s still rather young as far as a webseries goes, so I’ll bring it up as well. I am loving it. It has been brought to us by the magical unicorns who brought us Lizzie Bennet Diaries, so there’s something to be happy about right there. In case you haven’t been informed, Emma Approved is a modern-day adaption of one of Jane Austen’s classics, Emma. I have not read this one, but I am planning to, and I have seen the Gwyneth Paltrow adaption and Clueless, so I have a pretty good grasp on what is going to happen.

The casting for this show makes me smile. Emma is perfect (perfect as only Emma can be – see also: adorable bossy steamroller), Harriet is perfect, and Mr. Knightly is perfect. (if you read those last four words with a certain emphasis, then you’re not reading it wrong.)

And I must say, I do love the relationship between Emma and Knightly at the  moment.

Sum it up in a gif? If you insist.

They’re simply charming.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. is a show that has dragged my expectations around in a very erratic manner since it began. I missed a couple of episodes because life happened, but I am pleased to say I am all caught up now.

I loved the third and fourth episodes, but I’m slightly less crazy about the others. Don’t get me wrong, I am certainly enjoying it, it’s funny, has a good amount of fight scenes (but not an overabundance, where a lot of shows go wrong), but it is one of those shows that I’m a little bit embarrassed to watch if an uninterested party is in the room. Perhaps I’m just being overly cynical. Obviously, I’m going to keep watching it – I would be far, far sadder to see it go than I would to see it continue on in this caliber.

If you are looking for another episode of Mum’s Reviews (and who isn’t) like a couple of weeks ago, I’m sorry, but this week, Grey’s Anatomy took up the entirety of her attention during the episode, except for one Agents of SHIELD scene which induced me to say “WHAT” loudly, to which mum replied, “Is it believable?”

This was the scene in the hotel room when Skye’s surprise boyfriend, Miles, said he had been missing Skye like crazy.

(And no, not all that believable for me)

Also, thanks to Skymiles (are the writers doing this on purpose?), the latest episode really sent Skyward downward.

Shame.

But none of this changes the fact that Fitzsimmons are a pair of magical meerkats, and Coulson is a beauty. So of course I like the show.

Cabin Pressure is something else with which I am slowly catching up, and taking my sweet time too, in order to savor each delicious one-liner. If you are unfamiliar with this fabulous piece of ear candy, it is an audio comedy released by BBC One radio. Full of British humor and spectacular voice actors (Oh look, Benedict Cumberbatch is in there too), it’s a lot like Fawlty Towers set in an airplane.

What’s that?

You haven’t watched Fawlty Towers?

Well, in that case, it’s a lot like Cabin Pressure set in a hotel (And it has John Cleese in it. I rest my case). Go partake of both, and then come back here and laugh at everyone who isn’t enjoying life as much as they could be.

Now then, just one more thing before I go – but you’ve probably heard the news already.

It was spread fastest by the unified superfan shriek heard everywhere within three miles of civilization, after all. But in the case you have not yet been alerted, then know this —

The Sherlock season 3 air date has been released.

January 19th.

Yes, this January.

I know man it’s just so soon

How weird is it going to be when, as an entire fandom, we have no hiatus to weep about for nearly three weeks? People won’t even be able to recognize us anymore.

This day was always coming, I suppose.

Ready yourselves, Sherlockians. Today, that day is nearer than ever it was before.

*gently dabs away tears with handkerchief*

But anyway.

Thanks for catching up with me, dearies! If you have any experiences related to the above topics, I would love to hear about them in the comments.

Here’s to all our future adventures, fictional and otherwise.