For What It’s Worth

I was at work when I noticed what was going down.

Tuesday was a big day for the studios responsible for your knowledge of Norse mythology. The frankly unsettling amount of Marvel news unleashed yesterday hit the internet like a SHIELD helicarrier into the New York bay, so I feel you are all likely to know what I’m pleased about right now.

However, that’s totally not going to stop me from setting up a quick recap.

Ladies and Gentlemen!

I KNOW RIGHT

In addition to all that jazz, we have a few casting announcements, most notably that of Chadwick Boseman playing the Black Panther and Benedict Cumberbatch coming on board to play Dr. Strange.

Oh, not enough to get you excited? Have some footage of Captain Specimen tearing a log in half while Puny Stark looks on in wonder. 

I get it. You’re feeling greedy. Marvel assumed that would happen, so they’ve gone and gifted us with the a sneak peek of the Age of Ultron dinner party-vengers and their heaps of worthiness.

Of course, we mustn’t forget that said sneak-peek scene was preceded by Agents of SHIELD and their well-written, swift  machete stab to the gut with its latest episode, A Fractured House.

Guh.

(My heart goes out to all you poor souls not out-of-your-mind about these recent developments. We just need to get this out of our systems, and your patience will be greatly appreciated until that moment comes.)

Excelsior, my friends. Excelsior.

Post Traumatic SDCC Disorder

One week ago,  the very foundations of California were shaken by a single, unified fan scream.

If you live anywhere near an internet connection, I bet that you felt it too.

San Diego Comic-Con 2014.

Seeing as there’s no need to drop the ball on nerd-knowledge just because I was not present, I’ve compiled a list of my favorite bits from the convention. Therefore? Coming to you from that room of dreams, Hall H, here is some of the best of SDCC 2014.

• Chris Hardwick, Crown Prince of the nerds (and the person you wish you were), took the selfie to end all selfies with the one and only DC trinity.

You’re looking at Batman, Superman, and Wonder Woman posing for a picture taken by Marty McFly.

What a time to be alive.

• The Avengers: Age of Ultron panel featured a gloriously skilled and surprisingly long table of Avengers, and the angels cheered (though their voices were obscured by those of the hyperventilating fans in the crowd below).

Notable events included Chris Hemsworth’s announcement of intent to turn into the female Thor in an upcoming adaption (“I don’t want to jinx it, but this might be my oscar”), Robert Downey Jr’s gift of roses to the audience and to the lady cast members, and Josh Brolin (or as we know him, Thanos) making a surprise appearance for the sole purpose of fanfare and eating one of Downey’s proffered roses.

All very normal things.

• The Agents of SHIELD panel, (a show which outgrew its name in no more than twenty-two episodes)graced us all by releasing a gag reel.
• And later, still during the AoS panel, a teaser was shown (not available unless you’re a level seven agent) in which it was revealed that a Bobbi Morse was going to be joining the SHIELD roster.

Bobbi Morse? you ask. Wait, Mockingbird? You continue, standing up, your voice getting more frantic and excited. Sweet baby Moses, are you kidding me right now? you scream into the late afternoon sun as you spontaneously sprout wings and take off, startling your friends and family. Hawkeye crossovers aheadddd is the last thing your loved ones hear as you disappear over the horizon.

I know right I’m so excited too

• Since you couldn’t be there, Mark Ruffalo took the liberty of acting just like you would have in reaction to the range of celebrities present.

Living legend.

And, though it wasn’t officially related to the world’s biggest geek-fest, one has to question its convenient timing –

• Test footage leaked for that movie you want so badly.

“Test footage” people keep reminding us. “As in – not an actual movie. Not yet. Maybe not ever. This is test footage.”

To which, of course, fans collectively replied, “I can’t hear you,” before turning back to our friends and screaming “DEADPOOL” over and over again. All that leaked footage has largely been reclaimed by Fox on copyright grounds, but considering that few things are ever scrubbed form the internet, there are still a couple of places you can look. (Warnings: Strong language, and, hey, it’s Deadpool: violence)

• And of course, we may not forget the fantastically talent-crammed Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies panel.

Such a long panel, but the highlights as far as I am concerned involved Gollum impressions from Andy Serkis, an expression of interest in a LOTR-flavored museum with original props, and an analysis of how surprisingly attractive Elf ears can be (as if that was news to anyone).

As per the event, there were questions for the panelists: “Where would you take Smaug at the Comic-Con?” asked one fan. Benedict Cumberbatch, ever the charmingly insulting gentleman, made a face and replied “Probably Hall H. I don’t think he’d fit in anywhere else.”

I feel like one or two people might want to disagree, but considering that a good chunk of people probably dressed up as the menacing dragon, it seems a fair enough remark.

It takes all kinds at SDCC, so obviously there was much more to the convention; but these have been the parts that got me in the send-all-caps-texts-to-everyone-in-your-contact-list mood.

Pretty apparently, I didn’t make it this year. Maybe you didn’t either, if you felt compelled to come here to learn these things.

We didn’t make it this time. That’s okay. Not even Joss Whedon went this year. It’s okay to skip every now and then.

But let’s not make it a habit.

See you next year, fanpeople.

“It’s a Three-[Episode] Problem.”

Today in America, Sherlock season three, episode two, airs officially for the first time.

Today in the UK, or for everyone who has successfully tricked their computers into thinking it is the UK, it’s just another day in the new age of Sherlock hiatus.

Nine episodes from 2010 to 2014…

And welcome back to the waiting room, everybody.

Anyhow, due to the unpredictable nature of the internet and its inhabitants, if you have not properly watched the whole series yet, chances are you’ve at least had some element of it spoiled for you.

If you have not, simply continue reading and I promise that you will.

(That was a warning to the spoiler-shy. Be gone with you.)

I’m not trying to run a review blog here (for lots of reasons), but I need to talk about these episodes. I can’t not talk about these episodes. However, after several years of knowing myself, I’m aware that my tendency to wax eloquent (some pretty words for “never shut up until banned from all forms communication”) will force any conversation of mine about Sherlock into the space of novels, rather than chapters.

To be fair, there’s just too much to talk about – the Moriarty-Mind-Asylum, Sherlock’s even-more-of-a-jerk-than-usual bit, Molly’s serious over-correction after getting over Sherlock (meat dagger?), Mycroft’s unrealistic weight loss expectations…

Anyway, to take it all down a bit for post form, I’ve decided to condense each Sherlock season three episode into a study on one sentence, then two, then three.

Because that’s how many episodes there are.

Just three.

(weeps quietly)

The Empty Hearse:

• So we actually never find out how he did it?

Fine, we got the most credible solution at the end – but not from the mouth of Sherlock so much as from the Sherlock-flavored mind of a severely cray-cray Anderson. Rude. I think Sherlock, of all people, would be able to disregard John’s little “I don’t care how you did it” speech (speak for yourself) and tell him anyway.

No artist can resist signing his work.

The Sign of Three:

• Choosing Sherlock as the best man is simultaneously the best and worst decision John has ever made.

I would pay good money to have someone (Sherlock) flip over the reception table mid-speech, go “Let’s play MURDER,” and then proceed to solve the crime of the uncomfortably tight mandated belts.

It’s also worth mentioning that this episode made me irrationally afraid of ever wearing my own belts ever again.

• TELL ME ABOUT THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM.

I NEED TO KNOW ABOUT THIS MORE THAN I NEED TO KNOW ABOUT BUDAPEST, FOR GOODNESS’ SAKE

His Last Vow:

• Magnussen made me want to sanitize everything I own.

Fantastic villain.

And by fantastic, I mean, utterly disgusting. However, a good friend of mine did critique the episode by saying she felt like she didn’t hate Magnussen enough.

I pretended to understand.

I don’t understand.

(And yes, I really should have that on a t-shirt)

• Oh sweet mother of pearl, Mary Watson, what the heck.

Surprise, everyone. I know that a lot of us were suspicious when Sherlock deduced her to be a liar in episode 1 (along with a number of other things identified by the Sherlock-vision floating deductions), but I definitely saw no words reading “crazy-pants assassin” flying around her pretty face.

• And in answer to the episode’s final question,

I present to you a short text-message exchange between a friend and I.

On Catching Up

Hello dearies,

This post comes to you in five parts: Once Upon a Time, Emma Approved, Agents of SHIELD, Cabin Pressure, and January. (Yes, the month)

As of late, I have been catching up with a couple things and before you is my collective review of them. I’m sorry not sorry.

Once Upon a Time and I have recently reconnected after our squabble last season. Maybe it’s the thrill of being together again, maybe it’s improved, or maybe I just needed some time to myself, but it’s like we were never apart. He still has those annoying little habits, like relating backstory for days, and presenting cringe-worthy CGI, but if I can’t handle him at his worst, than I don’t deserve him at his best.

Don’t worry, even I find that last paragraph embarrassing.

No, but seriously, I’m quite enjoying the show now, between our lovely new villain (Peter Pan) and a delightful twist on our lovely old one (Captain Hook).

However, I admit that seeing my baby Tinkerbell dressed like a 90’s pop star wigged me out a bit.

But what can you do?

Emma Approved started a couple of weeks ago, but it’s still rather young as far as a webseries goes, so I’ll bring it up as well. I am loving it. It has been brought to us by the magical unicorns who brought us Lizzie Bennet Diaries, so there’s something to be happy about right there. In case you haven’t been informed, Emma Approved is a modern-day adaption of one of Jane Austen’s classics, Emma. I have not read this one, but I am planning to, and I have seen the Gwyneth Paltrow adaption and Clueless, so I have a pretty good grasp on what is going to happen.

The casting for this show makes me smile. Emma is perfect (perfect as only Emma can be – see also: adorable bossy steamroller), Harriet is perfect, and Mr. Knightly is perfect. (if you read those last four words with a certain emphasis, then you’re not reading it wrong.)

And I must say, I do love the relationship between Emma and Knightly at the  moment.

Sum it up in a gif? If you insist.

They’re simply charming.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. is a show that has dragged my expectations around in a very erratic manner since it began. I missed a couple of episodes because life happened, but I am pleased to say I am all caught up now.

I loved the third and fourth episodes, but I’m slightly less crazy about the others. Don’t get me wrong, I am certainly enjoying it, it’s funny, has a good amount of fight scenes (but not an overabundance, where a lot of shows go wrong), but it is one of those shows that I’m a little bit embarrassed to watch if an uninterested party is in the room. Perhaps I’m just being overly cynical. Obviously, I’m going to keep watching it – I would be far, far sadder to see it go than I would to see it continue on in this caliber.

If you are looking for another episode of Mum’s Reviews (and who isn’t) like a couple of weeks ago, I’m sorry, but this week, Grey’s Anatomy took up the entirety of her attention during the episode, except for one Agents of SHIELD scene which induced me to say “WHAT” loudly, to which mum replied, “Is it believable?”

This was the scene in the hotel room when Skye’s surprise boyfriend, Miles, said he had been missing Skye like crazy.

(And no, not all that believable for me)

Also, thanks to Skymiles (are the writers doing this on purpose?), the latest episode really sent Skyward downward.

Shame.

But none of this changes the fact that Fitzsimmons are a pair of magical meerkats, and Coulson is a beauty. So of course I like the show.

Cabin Pressure is something else with which I am slowly catching up, and taking my sweet time too, in order to savor each delicious one-liner. If you are unfamiliar with this fabulous piece of ear candy, it is an audio comedy released by BBC One radio. Full of British humor and spectacular voice actors (Oh look, Benedict Cumberbatch is in there too), it’s a lot like Fawlty Towers set in an airplane.

What’s that?

You haven’t watched Fawlty Towers?

Well, in that case, it’s a lot like Cabin Pressure set in a hotel (And it has John Cleese in it. I rest my case). Go partake of both, and then come back here and laugh at everyone who isn’t enjoying life as much as they could be.

Now then, just one more thing before I go – but you’ve probably heard the news already.

It was spread fastest by the unified superfan shriek heard everywhere within three miles of civilization, after all. But in the case you have not yet been alerted, then know this —

The Sherlock season 3 air date has been released.

January 19th.

Yes, this January.

I know man it’s just so soon

How weird is it going to be when, as an entire fandom, we have no hiatus to weep about for nearly three weeks? People won’t even be able to recognize us anymore.

This day was always coming, I suppose.

Ready yourselves, Sherlockians. Today, that day is nearer than ever it was before.

*gently dabs away tears with handkerchief*

But anyway.

Thanks for catching up with me, dearies! If you have any experiences related to the above topics, I would love to hear about them in the comments.

Here’s to all our future adventures, fictional and otherwise.